The Attack Of The Scientologists

Being a religious person myself, I am very accepting of the religions of other people. I find it fascinating to learn the viewpoints of people from all over the world, and discover why their faith is unique.

However, and this is a big however, there is one 'religion' that no matter how hard I try to understand, I still come up baffled in the end:

Scientology.

I've tried to understand it...I really have. But unfortunately as far as I can get is that the religion was written by some guy not too long ago and has something to do with aliens, and there are different levels you have to reach within the religion.

Anyway, I was downtown last week getting my hair cut, and I had to meet up with some people at the Eaton Centre, so I started walking in that general direction.

I pass a middle-aged guy who hands me a flyer and tells me to check out the Christmas Festival that is going on across the street. I smile, and do what most people do with flyers after random people hand them on the street - shove them right into my purse and ignore them.

Anyway, I'm walking for awhile before I realize I'm going in entirely the wrong direction. I have plently of time though, so there are no worries. Anyway, I walk past a younger kid (maybe a few years old than me) and he hands me a similar flyer. This time, since I will be passing the Festival, I check out the flyer.

It's about then I discover that this is no ordinary festival. Oh no. This is a Scientology Christmas Festival complete with an essay contest and a chance to buy L. Ron Hubbard's book. Mmhmm.

So, looking at the sidewalk, I try to walk by without creating much of a stir. I almost make it! But, alas...somebody decides to hand me a program in case I wish to check out the festivities. Being polite, I take it.

Big mistake. Seeing me take that program signalled that I had a slight interest in Scientology, and before I could blink, I had a man and a woman on either side of me asking me to "come talk to them for a few minutes inside their office." I politely said no and they urged me to come inside out of the cold for a "chat." I just walked away.

As I was walking, I started thinking about what I would have said. It would have probably had to have been something along the lines of "You may have John Travolta, but I'm sorry...Tom Cruise ruined it for you."

Needless to say, I'm not too sure I'll ever understand Scientology...I guess there are a few things out there that are best left unanswered.